Family Groups
(self-help and support)
for Families and Friends (?)
of Alcoholics and Drug Addicts !
Steps | Traditions | Service Manual | Theology | Conclusion
B ill W., cofounder of Alcoholics Anonymous and author of the Twelve Steps and the Twelve Traditions, was quite realistic as to the nature of the Fellowship to the founding of which he had contributed.
| A Cosmic Dancer In the delusion game, | A meditating Everything passes away, |
Little though he recites the sacred texts,
but puts the Teaching into practice,
forsaking lust, hatred, and delusion,
with true wisdom and emancipated mind,
clinging to nothing of this or any other world --
he indeed partakes of the blessings of a holy life.
Dhammapada 20
| F irst Step: letting go, giving up, surrendering, admitting our powerlessness. I had to give up a University degree, a profession, a job, a car, a house, children... I will be a pilgrim from now on. Did not the Buddha, Christ and saint Francis of Assisi say: "Give up mondanities - detach with love - agree to new values." A Power greater than ourselves...as we understood Him -- Here is a Buddhist principle. Doctor Carl Jung, famous Vienna psychiatrist and psychoanalyst, a spiritual adviser of Bill W's, was learned in Eastern religions. And, between the two World Wars, US intellectuals Bill and his wife Lois knew, were quite willing to learn about Eastern religions. The Prophet by Khalil Gibran, four quotations of which are to be found in One Day At a Time in Family Groups, was edited in 1923; its author was a Maronite Christian Lebanese. During the same period and with the same spirit, German writer Herman Hesse wrote Siddhartha (1922). Moral inventory -- Examen of Consciousness. Let's remember the old days Catholic catechism! The examination of conscience was part of the spiritual exercises of St. Ignatius Loyola, who founded the Jesuits Congregation in 1534 in Spain. By the same time, French explorer Jacques Cartier erected a cross at Gaspé and Rabelais wrote Gargantua. It was a time of great social turmoil like today: Reformation, Counter-Reformation, Wars of Religion in France, Inquisition in Spain. Another spiritual adviser of Bill's, Father Edward Dowling, was a Jesuit priest, and Reverend Sam Shoemaker was an Anglican (Episcopalian) clergyman who started the Oxford Group, henceforth Alcoholics Anonymous started. "Defects of caracter" or "personnality disorders", how different? -- The saying goes: "These Fellowships are but a bunch of sick people." And the saying went: "Pray for us, sinners." -- "...the exact nature of our wrongs" ...of our sins! -- Alcoholism, A Merry-Go-Round Named Denial... Made direct amends -- an act of contrition. See the Catechism: "My Lord, I deeply regret having offended You for You are infinitely good and pleasant, and sin displeases you. I commit not to sin again... " Pass the message on to those who still suffer -- "Carry the Good News to the whole Universe." (Gospels). In short -- Admitted we were powerless... Came to believe (regained self-confidence) ... Decided to let go, give up, surrender (turn our will and lives over) ... Made an examen of consciousness (moral inventory) ... Admitted the exact nature of our sins (wrongs, weaknesses, deficiencies). Were entirely ready to work our personality disorders (defects of caracter). Made up our mind to accept our shortcomings (intellectual and others, attention deficit disorder, etc. -- Defect, deficiency, deficit, dysfonction) ... Made an act of contrition (direct amend, reparation) to people we had harmed (hurt, offended). Continued our examen of consciousness and promptly admitted our sins... Sought through prayer and meditation... Tried to carry the message (the Good News)... |
| W ay of life -- Rule of life (of the Franciscan Monks for example). Bill knew well the history of early Franciscans by the time of the Crusades, of Cathares and Albigensians, another era of great social upheavals. Twelve Traditions: an art of living in a group, couple, committee, family, company, community, fellowship, etc. Anonymity -- Aren't members of social clubs such as Aramis, Knights of Colombus, Kinsmen, Kiwanis, Optimist, Rotary, etc, anonymous and discrete as to their public image? At another era, one changed name upon being admitted as a monk, like women while marrying. One became anonymous "in the century", i.e. at the level of press, radio, TV, movies and Internet. Mental -- mentality. If a person changed mentality, would he or she still be mentaly ill? This is an extremely still widespread prejudice now-a-days. However we know quite well that psychosis is much more a matter of heredity than of mentality: neuro-transmitters which do not work properly in some areas of the brain. There are two psychoses that often times run in families: schizophrenia and bipolar or unipolar depression. Other psychoses -- of which alcoholism and drug addiction -- are more or less side effects of these two diseases that can generate psychotic episodes. Long after having sobered up, Bill had to be treated for depressive bouts. "Rarely have we seen a person fail who has thouroughly followed our path [... ] There are those, too, who suffer from grave emotional or mental disorders, but many of them do recover if they have the capacity to be honest." ( Anonymous Alcoholics, chapter 5: "Our Method"). Recovery -- Healing, as in Our-Lady-of-Healing! (Notre Dame de la Recouvrance). Rehabilitation, etc. |
| B ill, being a stock broker, was acquainted with many boards of trustees. Thus our service structure owes much to companies and corporations. Boards of trustees are all made up of a president, a vice-president, a secretary, a treasurer and a few other administrators or officers according to the needs of districts, areas, etc. And our Service Manual is barely different from that of companies, organizations, Community Groups, etc, the majority of which borrow from the Robert's Rule of Order or Code Morin - the only difference being that Compagnies have a legal charter while Family Groups do not. (There are but a few exceptions: some FG Areas in USA are incorporated; they are generally large-size districts, as in Pennsylvania: 735 groups). |
| I n Quebec as eslewhere, its seems that many christians no longer go to church. But there is at least one catholic priest who does not worry so much. He looks after his own business in his prarish and pays not so much attention to guidelines from bishops, archbishops, cardinals, doctors and so on. He went to Family Groups for a while for he did not know how to react to people sick with alcoholism in his parish. Since then, he knows that each group - each parish - is autonomous, except in matters affecting another group - another parish - or the Fellowship - the Church - as a whole. For our parish purpose, says he, there is but one authority -- a loving God as He may express Himself in our parish conscience. Bishops, archbishops, cardinals, doctors, etc. are but trusted servants, they do not govern. They may cast as many guidelines as they wish, parishes are autonomous and parishoners are just as autonomous to do as they like with these guidelines. It is a matter of plain common sense (PCS!). Says he, those who cast such guidelines do not live in my parish but in theology manuals or service manuals. They have lost touch with reality. This is called schizophrenia. So good for them, says that rare common sense gifted catholic priest, I mind my own business in my parish. Quebec City (Canada), November 4th, 2006 |
| B ill often reminded early AA members: "Do not think you are so smart, folks, you did not invent anything. You owe much to religion, science and medicine." Sources "Family Group Resolution of gratitude to Alcoholics Anonymous" (World Service Conference, April 2001) AA Litterature The Language of the heart (During the Grapevine first 15 years, 1944 to 1959, Bill was the major editor. He answered questions as to day-to-day Group business, how to solve unavoidable personality clashes, power drives, etc. Bill tells us how he came to write the Twelve Traditions.) AA comes of age |
According to WSO, FG members are members for an average of five years. There are exceptions who establish themselves in Area backgrounds ad nauseam æternam till ordinary members who have been "trustful servants" for a while end up most of the time doubting the relevancy of these Groups, the concept of which -- which originates in very ancient times (Buddhists, Franciscans, Stoicians, Pythagoreans, etc.) -- is most often imported without discrimination. I subscribed to FGs for 27 years! I would not have survived anywhere else! Residual schizophrenia? Nonetheless, for whatever it is, you may give it a try just for the fun of it ! -- Gulemo
Note: There are "secular" or "rational" alternatives to 12-Step Recovery Programs; search for "Rational Recovery" or "Secular Recovery" in search engines: Resisting 12-Step Coercion | Addiction Recovery Guide | All Addictions | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | etc. -- YouTube!
Family Groups
(self-help and support)
for Families and Friends (?)
of Alcoholics and Drug Addicts !
"I have learnt silence from the talkative; tolerance from the intolerant and kindness from the unkind. I should not be ungrateful to those teachers." - Kahlil Gibran, Sand and Foam quoted in ODAT, p.87 (March 27th).
Home | Personnal Stories | Way of life | Opinion | Idéguec | Gulemo | Compete
Family Groups - Biz Card | Pilgrims Anonymous
